Forever Day, Never Night

Saturday, August 04, 2007

I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself

summer is winding down and im counting the days ... less than 30 days til im back in Oshkosh. I'm looking forward to it like a little kid waiting for its birthday party. i'm overly anxious to get back but i feel like this summer was just a waste of time. i didnt do anything that i wanted to do. everything revolved around work... it was usually my lack of hours which usually led to no money to do anything. this job of mine can fucking kiss my ass. now that summer is winding down im working close to 35 hours a week. yea i need the money and all but why couldnt i get these hours at the beginning? and not to mention the schedule is fucking bullshit. i put in over a month ago that i need this upcoming weekend off for this big festival that my town holds every year. and my boss schedules me. pretty much said that if its not fixed im not coming into work. i dont care if i get written up for it. i dont care if they fire me. honestly, i just dont care about that job anymore. they fucked me over big time this summer. my boss will get a very "nice" thank you later on my last day of work which is September 1. so moving on from work. i want one last hurrah for the summer i dont know what but i need somthing. with my luck though, nothing will happen. i want to go camping or something. i just know one thing that i need is to get ridiculously wasted with some good friends. in other thoughts, i'm feeling pretty useless lately. i'm not sure why but i think its cuz i dont do anyhting besides work. seriously thats all i do. i wake up at around 1030 then watch tv or surf the web, then get ready for work then go to work come home and go to bed. i dont do ANYTHING. and its starting to drive me crazy. i cant wait to have the stress of school again. from finding time to finish papers and squeezing in 2o minute naps between classes. late nights partying. and random crazyness. the more i've thought about this whole situation of living on my own in a dorm where i dont know anyone is starting to settle with me. i really need to buckle down on my grades. i need to get at least all Bs this semester. if i dont then idk anymore. i try and try and i still fail with what i need to accomplish. so not knowing anyone around me could be a good thing. more studying. less study breaks and interruptions. maybe ill just lock myself in the library for the whole semester? eh.. im freaking out about school already and its still a month away. i have waaay too many anxieties.

posted by Kristen at 2:16 PM -

1 Comments:

At 4:08 PM, Point Dexter said…

I hear you. :(